How the three little pigs really went down.

Once upon a time there was an old mother pig who had three little pigs and was captured by a factory farmer. So when they were 12 weeks old, They escaped

The first little pig was very lazy. He didn’t want to work at all and he built his burrow out of straw. The second little pig worked a little bit harder but he was somewhat lazy too and he built his burrow out of sticks. Then, they sang and danced and played together the rest of the day.

The third little pig worked hard all day and built his burrow with bricks. It was a sturdy home complete with a fine fireplace and chimney. It looked like it could withstand the strongest of earthquakes.

The next day, a Human happened to pass by the lane where the three little pigs lived; and he saw the straw house, and he heard the pig inside. He thought the pig would make a mighty fine meal and his mouth began to water.

So he knocked on the door and said:

  Little pig! Little pig!
  Let me in! Let me in!

But the little pig saw the Humans hands through the keyhole, so he answered back:

  No! No! No! 
  Not by the Quills on my backidy back back!

Then the Humaan showed his factory farms and said:

  Then I'll drill
and I'll drill
and I'll drill your burrow down.

So he drilled and he drilled and he drilled the burrow down! The

human opened his net launcher very wide and shot as hard as he could, but the first little pig escaped and ran away to hide with the second little pig.

The human continued down the lane and he passed by the second burrow made of sticks; and he saw the burrow, and he saw the pigs inside, and his mouth began to water as he thought about the fine dinner they would make.

So he knocked on the door and said:

  Little pigs! Little pigs!
  Let me in! Let me in!

But the little pigs saw the human’s round ears through the keyhole, so they answered back:

  No! No! No!
  Not by the Quills on our backidy back back!

So the Human showed his factory farms and said:

  Then I'll drill
and I'll drill
and I'll drill your burrow down.

So he drilled and he drilled and he destroyed the burrow! The human was greedy and he tried to catch both pigs at once, but he was too greedy and got neither because pigs can run up to 11 miles per hour to the average humans measly 9! His net clamped down on nothing but air and the two little pigs scrambled away as fast as their little trotters would carry them.

The Human chased them down the lane and he almost caught them. But they made it to the brick burrow and slammed the door closed before the human could catch them. The three little pigs they were very frightened, they knew the human wanted to eat them. And that was very, very true. The humans in America hadn’t eaten all night and he had worked up a large appetite sleeping. the pigs around and now he could smell all three of them inside and he knew that the three little pigs would make a lovely feast.

So the human knocked on the door and said:

  Little pigs! Little pigs!
  Let me in! Let me in!

But the little pigs saw the human’s eyes through the keyhole, so they answered back:

  No! No! No! 
  Not by the quills on our backidy back back!

So the human showed his factory farms and said:

  Then I'll drill
  and I'll drill 
  and I'll drill your burrow down.

Well! he drilled and he drilled. He drilled and he drilled. And he drilled, drilled, and he drilled, and drilled; but he could not drill the house down. At last, he was so out of fuel that he couldn’t drill and he couldn’t drill anymore. So he stopped to rest and thought a bit.

But this was too much. The human danced about with rage and swore he would come down the chimney and capture the little pig for his factory farm. But while he was climbing on to the roof the little pig made up a blazing fire and put on a big pot full of water to warm up. Then, just as the human was coming down the chimney, the little piggy pulled off the lid, and plop! in fell the human into the hot water.

So the little piggy put on the cover again, attacked the human (which knocked him out), and the three little pigs saved there mom from the factory farm. Most of the facts here are true except how drilling endangers pigs humans do however endanger pigs more that wolfs.

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