A Thanksgiving Escape by Devin Damon and the Founder of Piggiesarecool.com

A Thanksgiving Escape

Devin Damon and Pig MacTavish

November 24,1893

“Hey, Jerry, have you ever wanted to go outside this farm, so that we don’t get killed,” said preston. 

“Noooo, I want toooo become beef,” said Jerry.

“WHAT???” said Preston.  “Then you would die?”

Jerry said very, very, very stubbornly, “Nooo just want to become beef!”

“Uhh, Nevermind,” he said to Jerry frustratedly.

He looked over to Billy’s pen, which had bite marks all over it. Billy’s very broken pen had rusty and old ropes and chains. It had the smell of resistance. The smell of Billy. Oh wait, that was just Billy.  

“Hey Billy, how are you,” said Preston.

“ Hungry, they were starving me,” said Billy, eyeing Preston. “Me want Prestoneroni in the tin can.” 

“What’s with you and tin cans?” said Prestoneroni.”

“N…e…e…d  FOOD,” said Billy.
“Ok Billy, if I get you food will you train me?” said Preston.

“Food? Yes!”

 “But I didn’t even say for what-” said Preston.

The farmers shut the doors and turned off the lights. It is actually quite depressing.  For it is a representation of the lack of freedom even in early factory farms (and lazy writing).

November 25, 1893

“HONK-SHOO-HONK-HONK-SHOO” Preston woke up to the sound of very loud snoring.

Preston said, “Good morning Jerry.” 

“Slops up, pig 16216216424!” said the farmer.

 Jerry exclaimed, “Hey, he called you by your id number instead of just pig!”

“Ok, ok!  Where’s Billy?  Also, why do you snore like that?” said Preston confused on why Jerry snores like he does.

“Oh! Billy is just in his pen eating still,  also, did you know that he had snot running down his nose last night,” said Jerry with snot running down his nose.

“Oh?! Ok???  Bye, Jerry,” said Preston while having a nightmare thinking about Jerry.

  Preston moves two steps to the other pen and he notices Billy chowing down a few pounds of hay and his parts of his pen. His disgusting musty pen. 

“5 year rule!,” said Billy! 

              “That’s disgusting,” said Preston

Billy said,” NEED MORE!”

Preston said, “ Will you help me get you food?”

Billy said,  “YES, I WILL EVEN TRAIN YOU IN THE ART OF ESCAPE!”

“Thank you, Sensei Master Billy! 

 “I will help  you get food from the farmer who dared to call me pig 16216216424!” said Preston.

“AHH” Jerry said, “Big number scare me.” 

.    .    . 

The training was harsh. It required much jaw strength. Billy instructed Preston to start off with the “slop swim”. 

“Mmmm, delicious,” said preston.

 Billy yelled, “DO YOU THINK THIS IS A MEAL?!! THIS IS TRAINING!! SWIM, SWIM, SWIM!!! NOW HOLD YOUR BREATH FOR UP TO 1 MINUTE!!!!! GO!!!!!!!!!.” 

Preston said, “Oh, I just slurped up all the slop.” 

Billy said, “NOW MOVE ON TO THE FOOD TOSS!!! I WANT YOU TO CATCH ALL THE FOOD IN YOUR MOUTH!!!” 

Preston missed the first egg he tossed in the air and the second but on the third, fourth and fifth, he caught perfectly.  He got the sixth and seventh egg into his mouth at the same time. But they were interrupted by the noise of a truck.

“Shh!” said Preston, “This could be important intel.”

The man said, “So where are you going for Thanksgiving?”

The bigger and fatter man said, “I don’t know yet, I just know I want a big feast, mmm, pork and delicious roast beef, and the classic thanksgiving turkey.” 

The man said, “Yeah, I’m gonna have a small feast, but first we got to harvest the meat.”

The bigger and fatter man said, “You mean kill them all.”

The man said, “Yeah!!!” 

When they left, the farm burst into chaos. Clucks, moos, and turkey noises were everywhere. It was chaos until the first turkey was brought out of its cage and into the mysterious truck. He didn’t come out. Preston realized that they needed an escape plan. 

He said to Billy, “We need a plan.”  Billy, Preston (and technically Jerry.) Began formulating a plan to get everyone out. 

Preston said, “I will give you two a job. Jerry you will be the decoy. You might become become roast beef-”

Jerry said, “I WON’T DISAPPOINT YOU AGAIN, MOM!” 

Preston said, “Ok, Billy you must tell us everything you know about the outside world.” 

Billy said, “Humans suck, and Nature is lovely.”

Preston said, “. . . and with this intel I will assign jobs.”

After a while they formulated a plan .

Well, of course, the paper was a little chewed up, and handwriting SO HARD!

First, the plan was that they had to escape to freedom fields and not get to the butcher’s truck.  Second, get every animal out of the farm. Finally, get to freedom field corn maze, get through the maze, and reach freedom pond where they would be free.

In the beginning of the plan, Jerry rampaged through his pen and ran around wild.  The farmer and butcher noticed him as he rampaged the fence and ramed the farmer and butcher’s butt.

Meanwhile, Billy chewed his pen and escaped his pen.  He began chewing a hole right through Preston’s pen and Preston began freeing the other animals.   After that, Billy chewed a hole through the left side of the whole farm. Preston with his tail unlocked every lock on the pens and let animals escape freely.

While all that was happening, Jerry managed to escape the butcher and the farmer and was running to Freedom fields. He turned the wrong way once or twice. (Even thought it was just a straight line.) He made it and was helping escort some animals out into the freedom fields. Then a loud noise scared everyone followed by an announcement. “ALL UNITS THE ANIMALS ARE ALL ESCAPING! WE NEED BACK UP!”  

They made it into the corn fields and were hiding from the farmers and the butcher. A farmer passed over them. ONE SPOTTED THEM! It was tee posing to assert dominance. Panic broke throughout the fields everyone stopped. The mysterious man fell over. Then Billy remembered what it was. 

Billy said, “It’s a trap!” 

But by then it was too late the butcher and the farmer caught up and found them. 

Butcher said, “I’m gonna have extra fun killing you all!” 

Preston spoke to the horses and said, “ Help us launch the humans off and join us!

The horse said, “We can do that?”

Preston said, “Why not.”

The butcher brought out his blade, but was bucked off by the horse. They continued to hide from them but it was pretty much impossible. Then they saw it. The pond there it was. Everyone ran to it! But the butcher was  livid.  Now, not only here for the money, but for revenge.

Jerry and the butcher dueling to their last minute. They got ready to charge and . . . AARGH LLL.  They both lay on the ground silent and no movement came out of them.  The butcher was defeated and lay silent for good. Jerry lay silent, but Preston felt a beat. The horses carried Jerry to the pond which just so happened to be the serene pond of healing.

November 26, 18

The day was Thanksgiving and they were alive!  They sat down around a rock and talked.  They all gave thanks that they were free, alive, loved, and they could spend christmas together.  Maybe we could see them during Christmas. I don’t know? But in the end. . .

 Everyone lived happily ever after. 

THE END!